why i made modawana? its the first time for me to write i never tested that feeling i never tried to see if im good at expressing my thoughts and my feelings in words ,
and because i have so many thoughs and feelings than i can remember this next hour i will try to write them, altought a part of me prefers to write them in a private blog but the other half does not care if i put them in public , other reasons i decided to write to see if its like confessing? ,
can it release me ?
can that help me to be happier?
and thats the point where i get confused when i think of "happeness"its the simplest world which can describe what every one wants...we do everything we do just to be happy! ,, we go to school and study to get a good job and money and self esteem to be "happy", we help people to see them happy to be "happy", we pray and obey god in order to be sheltered by god an go to paradise to be "happy",, i know such things does not worth a proof but i needed that because i forget how simple it is!,,,
although the goal appears to be very simple but i cant figure what makes me happy?? what? thinking,,,,,
May be to me its an energy, thing when i have that energy rush in my blood running to every single peace of my body, that energy that gives me the power to do anything i can or i cant, that energy that ignores my brain and just do , energy that makes me dont care for the outcomes , that energy that keeps me out of regression or even thinking aboat it , that energy that power makes me happy ,,or maybe happiness gives me that energy ,,
:) if that's right , that gets me to the same question what makes me happy ? what gives me that energy ? thinking,,,,,
is it the place? no i dont think so
is it people or friends? i thougt that when i was young bat now no , or i think they affect but in a small ratio.
maybe music ?when i was young i thought that if i heared a happy good music in the morning that increases the propability of being happy the rest of the day :),usally it didnt work
may be drugs or alcohol? i used to think that but now i dont think so this is vertual reallity and it gives me a bad feeling more than the good one
may be sex?its a need but to me its like drugs somehow, I mean its Great but usually it takes my energy away
may be love? i have no i idea..
may be being loved?i think so it gives a good feeling, but it have a bad side that my dameer thinks that im stoned cause i dont give that love back
may be sucess? i think soo , that is the the funny part i need that "energy" to succeed in order to get energy
may be making people happy? yes but that sometimes also depends on my energy
if i continued saying maybe i wont study today
but im still thinking,,,,,
may be thats selfish to spend all that time to think about my own happiness but im selfish ,,
may be i will be happy whan i stop being selfish
its a long blog post for a first time , and i know the only thing im not perfect at :) is english , if any one my blogs and found mistakes in my english comment this mistakes
O.H
and because i have so many thoughs and feelings than i can remember this next hour i will try to write them, altought a part of me prefers to write them in a private blog but the other half does not care if i put them in public , other reasons i decided to write to see if its like confessing? ,
can it release me ?
can that help me to be happier?
and thats the point where i get confused when i think of "happeness"its the simplest world which can describe what every one wants...we do everything we do just to be happy! ,, we go to school and study to get a good job and money and self esteem to be "happy", we help people to see them happy to be "happy", we pray and obey god in order to be sheltered by god an go to paradise to be "happy",, i know such things does not worth a proof but i needed that because i forget how simple it is!,,,
although the goal appears to be very simple but i cant figure what makes me happy?? what? thinking,,,,,
May be to me its an energy, thing when i have that energy rush in my blood running to every single peace of my body, that energy that gives me the power to do anything i can or i cant, that energy that ignores my brain and just do , energy that makes me dont care for the outcomes , that energy that keeps me out of regression or even thinking aboat it , that energy that power makes me happy ,,or maybe happiness gives me that energy ,,
:) if that's right , that gets me to the same question what makes me happy ? what gives me that energy ? thinking,,,,,
is it the place? no i dont think so
is it people or friends? i thougt that when i was young bat now no , or i think they affect but in a small ratio.
maybe music ?when i was young i thought that if i heared a happy good music in the morning that increases the propability of being happy the rest of the day :),usally it didnt work
may be drugs or alcohol? i used to think that but now i dont think so this is vertual reallity and it gives me a bad feeling more than the good one
may be sex?its a need but to me its like drugs somehow, I mean its Great but usually it takes my energy away
may be love? i have no i idea..
may be being loved?i think so it gives a good feeling, but it have a bad side that my dameer thinks that im stoned cause i dont give that love back
may be sucess? i think soo , that is the the funny part i need that "energy" to succeed in order to get energy
may be making people happy? yes but that sometimes also depends on my energy
if i continued saying maybe i wont study today
but im still thinking,,,,,
may be thats selfish to spend all that time to think about my own happiness but im selfish ,,
may be i will be happy whan i stop being selfish
its a long blog post for a first time , and i know the only thing im not perfect at :) is english , if any one my blogs and found mistakes in my english comment this mistakes
O.H
elkalam metsha2leeb keda leee?
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